Narcissa Black: On Account of Living
by Cass the Curse
Summary: An account of Narcissa MalfoyBlack's younger years purrs Incomplete
1. Default Chapter

Please note I do not own Harry Potter, all characters are copyright to J.K. Rowling unless stated otherwise. If any other sources are used I will cite them a the end of the chapter  
  
Prologue  
  
Throughout our lives, there are things we lose and there are things we gain. Sometimes the things we lose are for the better...but sometimes we miss them like crazy. I think the one thing in my life I truly miss having a grip on is myself. I miss the young wild Narcissa who existed only until she got married to Lucius Malfoy. I suppose thats the purpose of writing this out, I would like to gain myself back in some way. I want to relive every memory, every feeling, I want to remember the sense of the Hogwarts breeze blowing the hair away from my face as I smiled coyly, mischieviously. Unable to be tied down. Still living only for herself, without a sense of the future. Just relishing the fact of being young, beautiful, and full of life.   
  
Now I wear my hair up everyday, and the only time I leave the house is when I'm attatched to Lucius' side. Don't get me wrong. I do love the man, I love him more than I love myself most of the time. But that's not to say I always did, when I was at Hogwarts I did what I wanted to whomever I wanted and I enjoyed it. I got high marks, and won over Prefect status in my fifth year which gave me more leniency when it came to breaking rules. Now if I wanted to wander at night I had an excuse. I was simply patrolling, or looking for a student who'd gone missing from the dormitories. Reminescing, however useless it is...is a way to keep me alive.  
  
I traced the design on my coffee mug with a perfectly groomed finger, despising the way the red nailpolish never chipped, how my nails never broke. How everything was always perfect. Every hair in place, every eyelash curled, not a bit of lint on my black robes lined with silver. The Malfoy family robes, they were what we were supposed to wear whenever we went out. Draco had his own set as well, although lately my son had taken to sulking in his room. There were many prices to Lucius' imprisonment. One being Draco's overwhelming and newly developed distate for his father. His claims that we were being abandoned, that his father was an idiot. I didn't even bother to disagree anymore.  
  
Lately I'd gotten so lost in my daydreaming that I barely heard what anyone was saying. I spent hours on end sitting in the Greenhouse, eying the roses that bloomed black and remembering everything. Remembering more specifically him, and the way I doubted he even thought of me anymore. But it didn't really matter. I could do nothing about the position I was in. There was no way to get myself back without losing my pride and my family. This is in fact the only way. I suppose I should spend no more time on worthless introductions, so without further adu. This is the account of my young life, starting at age eleven when I began my schooling at Hogwarts and ending at age seventeen when I finished with top marks and moved on to the next cycle of my life. Aware that everything was about to change drastically. 


	2. Dos

*sorry about the utter lack of updates. I've been so busy lately with work and junk*  
  
Chapter One  
  
There were only remnants of Narcissa Black's thinking as she stood in front of the mirror in her bedroom, she turned delicately on her new shoes and admired herself in the mirror. Front, back, and side to side she looked like a dangerous dream. She was sure she'd make quite the impression, assuming that the spray from the lake didn't mess up her curls. She toyed with a blonde ringlet, thin narrow finger twisting it around it's length. Today was a day for changes, for meeting new people and learning new things. She smiled at herself twirling again. That was when she was so rudely interrupted by the raucous banging of her bedroom door. Andromeda stood there staring at her as if she were insane.  
  
"What on earth are you doing, Narcissa? I'd like to get to school sometime before the train leaves." The older girl stressed. Narcissa sighed heavily and grabbed her suitcases pushing them out of the room behind the thin frame of her sister Andromeda. Andy had already been attending Hogwarts for a year, under the watchful disdain of their parents. The black haired beauty got top marks in all her classes and got along well with everybody in her house. The problem was that her house was Gryffindor. Narcissa gave a slight shudder clenching her hand around the handle of her suitcase. She only hoped that the Sorting Hat would place her in Slytherin, that was all she asked for. She didn't want to be another disappointment for her family.  
  
Kicking her bags down the stairs Narcissa skipped after them, Andromeda was already standing impatiently at the main entrance her arms folded over her chest. She waved her hand at Narcissa and she began shouting.  
  
"MUM! Dad! I'm ready, lets go!" Narcissa howled, only a moment later her parents were standing in the entrance hall too. They didn't give a glance to Andromeda as they left the house. But Mrs. Black was assuring Narcissa of how beautiful she looked the whole way, giving her advice on boys, telling her not to settle for just anyone. Muttering under her breath. Running on only remnants wasn't easy, and she was nervous. Butterflies burrowed into her stomach as they walked the short distance to Kings Cross Station. Her Father murmuring the whole way about the disgusting muggles and how he hated being this close to them even just twice a year. Andromeda spoke not a single word as they boarded the Hogwarts Express. Glancing sidelong at her sister she sighed and then forced out a quick,  
  
"Goodluck."  
  
Narcissa squeaked quietly. "Andy? Your leaving?"  
  
Andromeda didn't reply to this mainly because she was already in a compartment full of Gryffindors. Narcissa tucked a curl behind her hair and stuck her nose in the air. No matter, who needed Andromeda anyways? Certainly not her. She was Narcissa Black and she would do well enough on her own. She pushed her way past compartment after compartment finally shoving into a sparsely populated one where only one boy sat. He had a book open on his lap and a pen between his lips, not a quill a pen. Finding this rather curious Narcissa took a seat across from him. She didn't know anyone yet, it was hard to be sure who to talk to and who not to. Her parents had insisted she associate only with the children she'd already been introduced to. The friends of family with pureblood and pockets full of cash. But Narcissa had always been curious and for some reason this young boy intrigued her. He didn't look up when she sat down just continued skimming the pages. She cleared her throat several times and finally he looked up.  
  
"Oh...Lo' didn't see you there." He muttered taking the pen from his lips and using it to mark his place in his book. She ignored him and jutted out a hand.  
  
"Thats because you had your nose in that bloody book of yours, I'm Narcissa Black." She introduced speaking her name with the utmost pride. The sandy haired boy raised an eyebrow at her hand and then extended his own shaking hers lightly.  
  
"Remus Lupin." He muttered diverting his eyes from her crystal blue gaze as he slipped his book back into a satchel that sat on the chair beside him.   
  
"Is this your first year?" Narcissa questioned brazenly, he nodded looking up at her briefly with twinkling brown eyes. She could've purred but at that moment the door to their compartment was thrown open again by a painfully familiar boy. Sirius. She winced and shoved herself out of her chair quickly.  
  
"I'll just be leaving then." Sirius grinned at her and pushed past her taking the seat she'd just abandoned and stretching his legs across the rest of the room so as no one else could sit down. Narcissa wrinkled her nose in disgust.  
  
"Your so rude, Sirius." The black haired boy just shrugged and proceeded to introduce himself to Remus, after a moment they were indulged in conversation and Narcissa was standing there stupidly in the compartment door. Sighing heavily she left the compartment only pausing when she heard a hindered shout after her,  
  
"Nice to meet you, Narcissa!" It was Remus. She smiled lightly brushing a pale curl away from her face and wandered to another compartment where she wound up sitting on the ground with the very purebloods her parents had encourage she associate with. 


End file.
